As a personal development junkie and coach for goal-getters, I consistently see people struggle through 4 major roadblocks. I myself have personally fought through many of these in my early years.
The insight that I’m sharing with you today will help you no matter what stage of personal development you’re at and no matter how far along you are in your goal crushing journey. From beginners to advanced goal-crushing machines you will value this post for years to come! *wink* you can thank me later! *Drum roll please!*
The first and primary obstacle I see hindering people’s progress is…
This is a hard habit to break. It shows up like a thief in the night as soon as we make a commitment to pursue our goals. Think about it, most of us make new years resolutions, but how many of us actually achieve them? Only about 8% according to research done by the Statistic Brain Research Institute.
We don’t achieve our goals for various reasons but make no mistake about it, procrastination is at the top of the list!
Research shows that most people believe they are more capable, gifted, skilled, eloquent, and so on than they actually are. We generally have a tenancy to overestimate what we can do and end up letting ourselves or others down.
Another way that we lack self-awareness is when we don’t consider the heavy consequences associated with not achieving our goal. Before you decide to slack off on your goal(s) really think about who suffers in the end? Most likely it’s you. You will not only suffer the pain of regret and live the rest of your life wondering “what if I tried…what if I actually achieved my goal, how would my life be better now?…” you will also have less confidence in yourself.
One question I always ask myself before I pursue any goal is will you be proud of who you become? If the goal is something that I want to be true at the end of my life or is something that I want to be a part of my life story then I go for it. On the other hand. if it’s a good idea and something nice to add to my story but it isn’t really something I’m passionate about, I simply put it on my list of cool ideas and after I complete my passion projects I slide in a cool idea just for fun to spice up my life a little bit.
According to US News, 80% of people who make new years resolutions fail by mid-February. Are you one of them? Let’s be honest. I’ve been in this boat before. I even stopped setting goals because I didn’t want to fail or beat myself up for not being committed to what I really claimed to want.
The truth is life gets busy, but another truth is that we all make time for what’s important to us. The reason why you suck at achieving your goals is because 1. You don’t know what you’re doing and 2. You’re way too comfortable!
You have to get sick and tired of being sick and tired, broke, overweight, struggling to find love, hating your job, regretting your choices, and feeling bad about your life. You have to get tired of the cycle, tired of the abuse, tired of lack, and tired of the emptiness you feel. Look at where your life is and decide that now is the time to change. Only you can get up and walk out of your comfort zone.
As a coach, I know that habits and mindsets are the biggest hinderances to personal growth, but with realistic goals and a teachable heart, I’ve seen people completely transform into goal crushing success machines! This can become your story too if you want it to be.
Step 1: Face the unknown
Stop making decisions based on the possible negative outcomes. Notice I said “making decisions…” so I’m not saying don’t consider the negative outcomes, I’m saying don’t make decisions based on them.
There will always be pros and cons to everything you do. To decide whether something is worth pursuing don’t base it on which option outweighs the other. Instead, base it on which one is worth more to you. Which one will add more joy and experience to your life? Which do you want to be true at the end of your life? The fact that you went for it or that you chose the easy road? Which do you know will give you peace at night? Choose to face the unknown.
Step 2: Failure is your friend
Failure is not who you are or someone you can become it’s an event. Don’t be afraid of making mistakes because they teach you valuable lessons. Now I personally prefer learning from the mistakes of others. It saves me time and energy (sometimes money too!) but have experienced failure and it’s discouraging! It doesn’t feel good, I don’t feel more motivated, I just want to push past it and move on. However, here’s something I learned if you don’t examine your failure you are more likely to make the same mistake. Why? Because you haven’t dealt with the root of the problem.
Imagine a doctor tells a patient they have cancer. Instead of treating the cause of cancer they give the patient medicine that only deals with the symptoms and not cancer itself. What are the chances of the patient surviving? close to none right? Well, it’s the same with our mistakes. If we don’t examine the problem, find the reason for the mistake, and then resolve it we will keep repeating the same behaviour.
Nothing changes unless you do.
Step 3: Find Solutions
Try this excerise. On a piece of paper write “what if I fail because…” then make a list of every fear stopping you from pursuing your dreams whether it’s logical or not. Do this until all of your ideas are completely out of your mind. Now beside each reason for failure write 5 solutions to that problem. Here’s an example:
What if I fail because…
1. I don’t know what I’m doing
2. I have no experience
3. Etc
Solutions:
1. I can …Hire a coach, do research, talk to people who have done it, go back to school, join an internship.
2. I can…volunteer somewhere, find a mentor, work with someone who has done it…
There will always be 1,000 voices giving you all of the reasons why you can’t, will never or should not pursue your goals, but I will always be the voice of reason asking you why not?!
Let’s crush this year and make 2019 your best year yet. Believe in yourself. choose to pursue your goals and this time you don’t have to go at it alone. We’re here to help. Until next time! Xoxo.
Listen, this whole goal-achievement thing is a lot better with real friends in your corner. Join thousands of other ambitious Goal-Getters just like you for a weekly dose of perspective, honest encouragement, and practical next steps to help you finally cross those goals off your list.
greatness is contagious
RISE • become the person • RISE • become the person • RISE
JOIN THE community